I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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