I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
