Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
