She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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