it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Randomize
