How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
