Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
