at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
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