Don't you send me to vm
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
