Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
