Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
