I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
