Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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