I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
