Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize