think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
This girl is more easily done than said...
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
