it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
