and you said cock pushups were impossible
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
