If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
