i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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