When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
