he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Randomize
