I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
