Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
