Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
