im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I think my fart just growled at me.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
