Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
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