I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
