he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
