She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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