Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Randomize
