I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
