He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
