coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
