I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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