I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Randomize
