My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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