I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize