I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
