idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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