Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
