So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
