Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
