So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
