If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
