I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
