Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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