Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
