so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
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