I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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